First Post in the style of Mark England

The first post, as everyone knows, is doomed to suck. You've got, what, a paragraph of content that's relevent, if that? Well, who am I to interrupt literally months of tradition?

So this post will suck. In fact, it's in the process of doing it right now. No matter how much psychic energy I expend, it will continue its descent into the toilet.

It is at this point in any post that I have the moment of the reality check. You know that of which I speak. I'm typing along and suddenly think, "Who the hell cares?" This moment has been the weedout for many a post.

It has also failed to stop some really bad ones. A lot like airport security.

I have a secret. I'm not going to tell you what it is, though, becuase 1) I like secrets and 2) I can't tell you what it is.

Oh, and in other news, the Pope has said I'm not a Christian. Or at least not a "real" Christian. Anyone up for a discussion on transferrable merit? Don't think that's not where he's going.